How to Invite Guests to Your Destination Wedding Using the Correct Destination Wedding Etiquette

Inviting guests to your destination wedding represents a slightly different scenario than that for a traditional wedding. Formal invitations, for example, are not an absolute necessity. Save the date cards, however, are much more common. It’s important to keep wedding etiquette in mind, though. Some rules will not apply to a destination wedding, while others apply no matter what type of wedding you are planning. When it comes to inviting guests, let the formality of your wedding guide the way.

There are no hard and fast rules of who you should invite or how many people you should invite. It’s entirely up to you whether you invite only family or include some close personal friends. If your guest list is quite large, then you will want to ensure that the location can accommodate everyone on your guest list should they all decide to join you for your wedding day.

While regular guests will be responsible for their own travel and lodging, it is expected that you will pay for the lodging of your attendants. This remains proper etiquette for all weddings, destination or not; if attendants require lodging to participate in your wedding you are obligated to cover their lodging for two days. Travel costs are not included in this custom.

It’s important not to invite anyone who you truly do not want to attend. Many couples assume that guests will decline the invitation to a destination wedding because of the time and cost involved in getting there. This can lead to awkward moments if someone you expected to decline decides that your wedding is the perfect vacation opportunity that they’ve been waiting for. So keep it simple and only invite those that you truly want to have sharing your special day with you.

Once you’ve established your guest list, you will want to send out a save the date card well in advance. This will ensure that everyone knows when you’re planning to marry and where. This will help your guests make plans to attend if they want, including saving up for the expense, booking time off of work and arranging for a passport if it’s required. You may want to include a list of hotels and resorts at various budget levels to help guests with their planning. As you are planning, keep in mind that if you have chosen to get married in a resort with a day-fee then you are expected to cover these fees for invited guests. It remains the height of tackiness to expect invited guests to pay admission to your wedding.

While the save the date card will likely help you narrow down your guest list, it remains proper etiquette to still send invitations to all those who received a save the date card and not just those who have pre-committed to attend. Of course, this doesn’t apply if you’re being quite informal and sending out e-vites. Some destination couples print only a handful of formal invitations for mementoes, and send an image of the invitation through email or a website. It can be difficult to find invitation vendors who will do short runs of invitations, so you may need to get creative if you only need a limited number.

If your guests choose to buy you gifts in addition to attending your wedding, it’s best to have them directed to send your gifts to your home address. Of course, etiquette dictates that this is not information that is transmitted through your save the date announcements or invitations. The best way to handle this detail is to allow your attendants and parents to spread this information through word of mouth.

You will want to send out announcements of your wedding soon after the fact. These can be prepared in advance and sent out the day of your wedding or as soon as you return home. These will go out to all those friends and family who didn’t make the cut for the guest list, but are still important enough to you to keep updated and notified of this momentous occasion in your life.

Best Wishes for a great Destination Wedding, and be sure to come back and post a comment telling us about your event!